Colombia - A reflection (part 2)

This morning, whilst waiting for my 7am coffee to brew, my thoughts wandered to some of my more recent travel experiences to date.  I am recently home in Northern Ireland, following a year of working and living in Bogotá, Colombia.

I am lucky and have had the chance to travel a lot for such a young age. Mostly it has been for work or study but that is not to say that it has not been a conscious choice of my own. I guess I’m a bit of a travel nerd. There’s something about it. I guess I’ve got it…’the bug’ that is…and not the type I got trekking through the Lost City in Colombia! The travel bug…

This blog is a continuation of my most recent one, a reflection upon my recent travels to Colombia where I was working for a year teaching English Language at la Universidad Nacional in Bogotá. I’m not overly religious, but there is something special or perhaps let’s say ‘spiritual’ about travelling...or at least, being abroad, being removed from your own culture and exposed to a completely different one.

During my travels, primarily through Asia and South America, I have learnt a lot about the world. I have seen sights that have shocked me, scared me, amazed me, amused me, bemused me and made me laugh till my sides hurt.

But…there’s something more to travelling than that selfish obsession with ‘the experience’ or the story that you’re going to tell your friends and family upon return. For me, and I speak for most ‘travelers’ I think, it’s something more: it’s a never ending journey of self-discovery. Travel is a therapy. It heals wounds that some medicines cannot heal and it teaches you lessons you won’t learn at school or find in a book.

The following list is a continuation of what I believe is the main things I have learnt during the past year. May I continue to do so…

1.       Find what makes you happy…and do it
Life is short. Find out what it is that makes you happy. Discover something new you love doing or take up a hobby. Enjoy the little things in life; spending all morning in pyjamas, watching the sun set and enjoying a bottle of good wine.

2.       You are stronger than you think you are
Don’t be afraid to realise that you are strong than you think you might be. Life throws some curve balls sometimes. Fight back. Life is worth living, so don’t let it get you down. Surround yourself with positive things. Expel negative people and thoughts from your life…you do not need them. Be strong. Look after others, but remember to look after yourself first. Make yourself a priority.

3.       Don’t hold grudges. Forgive and forget
Friendships can be easily broken and sometimes irreparable. Time can heal, but it can also strain relationships. Don’t let time pass without patching up unresolved tensions or problems. Forgive, even when it’s not easy. Holding grudges won’t help you.

4.       When shit happens don’t let it stop you from living your life.
Being cheated on, being robbed, and getting drugged with scopolamine. The above are all things that happened to me during my time in Colombia. They weren't pleasant and they certainly knocked me back a few steps. Nonetheless, despite how hard it is don’t let it prevent you from moving forward in life. Face your difficulties and your fears and surround yourself with friends and loved ones for support. When you’re ready, confront your personal demons and move on.

5.       Stop over-analysing things
When you don’t understand something whether it be a complex Spanish idiom, a text message you have awkwardly received from an ex or a certain aspect of a culture that you struggle to digest…stop over-analysing the situation and accept that things are done differently in other parts of the world. Take a step back, breath and count to ten. Everything will be ok.

6.       Some things ARE out of our control and we can’t stop them from happening
Sometimes bad things happen. Even more-so, sometimes bad things happen to good people. Try not to dwell on the hard times too much. Karma, fate, destiny, whatever you wish to call it. Whether you chose to believe it or not, acknowledge at least the truth that you are only in charge of your own actions…not the consequences that stem from them.  When shit happens, keep your chin up and keep moving forward.

7.       Don’t be afraid to move on

When you get bored of a place or lack inspiration to continue doing what you do, stop and move on to find something new that excites you.

8.       We are all the same.
Despite our differences, we are all humans trying to make sense of an endlessly evolving world. Skin colour, sexual orientation and political stance do not and should never encapsulate our very being or sense of identity.

Thomas Stephen Szasz said that:

      “The plague of mankind is the fear and rejection of diversity: monotheism, monarchy, monogamy and, in our age, monomedicine. The belief that there is only one right way to live, only one right way to regulate religious, political, sexual, medical affairs is the root cause of the greatest threat to man: members of his own species, bent on ensuring his salvation, security, and sanity. ” 

We need to realise that we are all different but we are all humans and stem from the same branch. Therefore we should put aside the small cultural differences that make us different and focus on the larger things that unite us. No one deserves to be judged by or have their life dictated by their personal religious beliefs, socio-economic background, political ideology or sexual orientation.

9.       Be wary who you trust
Be careful who you decide to make friends with. Not everyone has your best interests at heart. Be honest to others and to yourself and be careful not to get hurt.

10.   The world is small. Embrace it.
The world is small. People travel more and know more things about countries and cultures which are not their own.  Diversity is not something to be afraid of but to embrace. Only then will we ever be able to try and make sense of the world in which we live. 

Colombia - A reflection (Part 1)

So, I have now spent a few months back in Northern Ireland after spending a year living in Colombia, South America. Whilst in Colombia, I was faced with what seemed like a never ending string of situations and experiences that challenged me and helped me grow into something closer to the person that I hope to be.

Marcel Proust, a popular French novelist and literary critic stated that “The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” Leaving the comforts of a life as a teacher in the UK in search of something more exciting, Colombia provided much more than I ever expected, and perhaps desired in some occasions.

I grew to develop a love/hate relationship with the culture and all aspects of life that stemmed from it. Like Proust said, I headed for Latin America in search of seeking new landscapes, new sights and new experiences but I was not ready…well not completely for some of the lessons that I would have to learn during my time there.

I am a firm believer that in order to fully understand some things, removing yourself (and in my case physically) from the situation who can look at it with fresh eyes. Eyes that have had time to adjust to reality and reflect critically but sensibly upon what they have just witnessed.

I guess that it is now time to look at my time in Colombia through what I guess Proust would have called ‘new eyes’.

1.       Time is precious, spend it wisely

Corny, cheesy, cringe-worthy…call it what you like but it’s true. There were times I wished my time away in Colombia, desiring of returning home to the comforts of the UK or to other far-away lands. Having lived in various parts of the UK, Europe, Asia and South America…I have become used to but not numb to having to say goodbye. Every time I leave somewhere, and a little piece of my soul there I can’t help but be thankful for the time I spent there growing to know a new culture and developing friendships. Time really is precious; spend it wisely doing whatever it is that makes you happy…and never stop

2.       Tell people daily as much as you can how much you love them

Being British, we tend not to open up our hearts and struggle to show our emotions. Perhaps it’s due to a fear of rejection, or of being hurt. Perhaps, more simply, we see it as unnecessary and perhaps slightly OTT. In Colombia, I grew to not only accept or appreciate but begin to endorse the Latin American culture of telling people how much I loved them. Family and friendships are fundamental aspects of not just Latino culture but the world and the essence of life itself. 

3.       Be thankful for what you have. There is always someone worse off than you

I am by no means wealthy. I am a Modern Foreign Languages teacher in a London school. My salary disappears on rent, bills and transport. Nonetheless, I have learnt to stop complaining. I have friends, I have family, and I have opportunities. Travel has opened my eyes to the fact that I am extremely lucky and I hope that I never cease to realise how blessed I am. I have worked with orphaned children in Uganda, spoke to land mine victims in Cambodia, seen the prostitutes at work and the homeless begging in Colombia and thank God every time that it’s not me…not out of pity, nor to be patronising but to appreciate that life has been kind to me and to be thankful.

4.       Push yourself out of your comfort zones. You will be amazed at what you will learn

Go bungee jumping, trek the Andes in Ecuador alone, take a one-way flight to Bogotá. Whatever it is that pushes you to the extreme…do it. Sometimes, it’s scary, sometimes it’s hard but the rewards are endless. Walsch said ‘life begins at the end of your comfort zone’. Push yourself until you find whatever it is you’re looking for.

5.       Never judge a book by its cover

During my time in Colombia, I met a lot of people. Spending time in hostels and talking to strangers taught me that you should never make assumptions. Respect people, their culture and the decisions they have made as to how they live their life. Try not to be prejudice towards someone based purely upon their nationality, stereotype, gender, sexuality or anything else which you feel may define them as a human being.

6.       Take risks but be prepared to suffer the consequences

It’s good to take risks but that’s not always to say that you don’t have to suffer the consequences of your actions. Stepping out of your comfort zone is never easy and sometimes you end up in tricky situations, especially abroad. Move on from your errors, reflect upon your past but try not to dwell upon it.

7.       Being alone and being lonely are not necessarily the same thing

There is nothing wrong with being on your own. This year I took a month to travel myself around Ecuador. This was my first experience of travelling properly on my own, and it was exactly what I needed…a sort of meditation. I left all my ‘baggage’ back in the jungle somewhere in Ecuador and headed back to my life in Colombia feeling fully refreshed and rejuvenated.

8.       Stop and listen

I am a perfectionist. I like to do things my way and I like to also tell people how I think things should get done. I guess that being a teacher; I somehow feel that I am always right and that being opinionated somehow makes me a better person. Recently, I read a blog by a friend and gifted writer who wrote:

   ‘Read the signs - Take your time. Look for the red light and listen to the alarm bells ringing. Go with your instinct and that gut feeling. Signs are like a language that one has to practice throughout life in order to become fluent. You can waste a lot of time and energy by denying the obvious, ignoring the hints, warnings and nudges in the right direction. Follow the path that leads you to peace by listening and understanding the energy that surrounds you’ 

Every so often, stop doing what you do and question your actions. Listen to others and learn from them. Try to see others point of view, even if they are contrary to your own…You never know what you might learn.

9.       It’s ok to make mistakes sometimes

Author Rick Warren wrote that “We are products of our past, but we don't have to be prisoners of it.” Learn from your mistakes but try not to make them twice. Don’t become a slave to guilt and certainly do not permit it to stop you living life to the full. Life wouldn’t be half as interesting without a few stumbles and falls along the way. Our past shapes our future, but it doesn’t have to dictate it. Find out who you want to be and do what you have to do to get there, without letting your past stop you.

10.   If you put our mind to something…you can achieve it

Realise that you are the captain to your own ship…a piece of advice from my father. You are in control, no one else. Realise that! Life is short and for living, but that’s not to see that it comes without its own set of challenges and difficulties. Don’t let anything stand between you and your goals.